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21st Century Poet (Helsinki Airport Demo Versions)

by Brian Smith

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1.
Trying To Remain 04:14
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Should I be profound in conversation, is that what you’re expecting? Should I conquer the room with every word that I say? Well I’ll maintain my lack of elegance if it means you won’t dissect me For I am just trying to remain You say you thought I’d be different, well why don’t you tell that to a mirror? I’m sure there are a million stooges that would happily fill my place So line up for registration and you too can be a pseudo intellectual Meanwhile I’m just trying to remain And you claim to love music, but you’re only listening to your radio You say you’re well read, but only if it’s critically acclaimed And I should have headed the warnings not to dance with those I can see through But I am just trying to remain You suggest the grass may be greener, but this can’t be true in all directions For some places have no offerings, but only stains I could list them alphabetically, but this is something I’d rather not do For I am just trying to remain And what happened to all the men that you said you respected? Have they evaporated by morning along with the rain? Well you know that even your god never paid any child support Meanwhile I’m just trying to remain There’s no need to get upset, it’s just a minor loss of freedom Or at least that’s what you said when the Moldovans had me detained And now I’m trying, I’m trying so hard just to forget you For it’s the only way I know to remain Oh it’s the only way I know to remain Oh it’s the only way I know to remain Yeah it’s the only way I know to remain
2.
The Reason To Stay (That I've Left Behind) 03:50
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A chance encounter With a perfect stranger Upon destiny, who was I to intrude? A future lost and A dream forgotten My life existing without the ones I never knew Those loving feelings That I’m not feeling A heart not broken in two Those endless hours And unbought flowers A steaming kettle not left long enough to brew And all the best to you In all that you do You’re the reason to stay That I’ve left behind A torch not burning Two hearts not yearning No tears felt protruding through the phone No longing passions Or guilty attractions No comparisons for a current state alone So remember me when Your mind is screamin’ That you chose the wrong fork in the road And I’ll be out there With your same prayer When the memory is all that I can hold And all the best to you In all that you do You’re the reason to stay That I’ve left behind And I’ve found time to be the meaning of life Moving on after another frame has died Recycled into an unforgotten shrine Of the moments once possible to find And all the best to you In all that you do You’re the reason to stay That I’ve left behind And all the best to you In all that you do You’re the reason to stay That I’ve left behind
3.
Leaning 01:04
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I lean for the love of an angel For the beauty I never approached For the teeth which cling to my earlobes For the salvation I never could know I carry the burden of confidence Forgotten when I step off the stage For I am only asking for directions If you have the time to show me the way To your ominous well which hides in yourself Secluded from the world you see And I’ll drink from your cup if you can spare me enough That I may be drunk until I am sweet For these are the hands which long to write plans That the lips are unable to read For the lips and the brain are more often the same Than the hands with their patience to think And if this is the reason, please forgive me for treason For never knowing the right words to say For I lean out so much that I have nothing to touch But your footprints when you walk away
4.
Sugar Lady 04:23
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Oh I met a sugar lady, she was sugar sweet She’d give it away to anyone, but never to me And I heard there’s a handful of young beauties, but they couldn’t compete With that rock rock rock owning all the life on these streets Now, I was standing on the corner and she asked me for the time I said, “pretty baby, I got none, but you’re wasting mine” Then she walked away to where I don’t know and I’m standing here in my overcoat thinking, “it looks like I’ll be heading home alone” Oh it looks like I’ll be heading home alone Now I heard a rumor she’s no stranger to fast cash But if you ask her about it, oh she won’t mention that For her body’s a temple, they worship inside until all who come have seen the light that she shines Oh that she shines But as for me you see, I’ve never known deep pockets Just some bubble gum and an empty wallet Then she said, “honey I think you’ll do just fine. We’ll start you off with just one night” and I was in heaven until I realized that it was all in my mind All in my mind And now years later, I heard she still roams around But they don’t call her the sugar lady now She’s retired or tired, either/or, maybe the glamour life became a bore, but she’s just not as sweet anymore Oh she’s just not as sweet anymore And me you ask, well I’m still the same Got no sugar lady, but I still chase the name And I’ll disappear one day you know on the exact one it’s my time to go thinking, “it looks like I’ll be heading home alone” Oh it looks like I’ll be heading home alone
5.
Dear, It's You 04:05
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If you want to play the part of the attacker Don’t get offended when I’m obliged to defend There’s no need to mourn your disposition When it’s the one that you have created Yet you wear your burdens as a crown of sorrows And claim that those better off are rubbing salt in your wounds And you look about to whom to point your finger But dear it’s you, dear it’s you Dear it’s you, dear it’s you And with every encounter, you’re seeking persuasion To conform the masses to your narrow point-of-view But when outwitted, you so quickly surrender Yet you never learn and you don’t desire to And it’s apparent you’re personified ignorance The looks of which till now I never knew But if asked, I could easily produce an illustration For dear it’s you, dear it’s you Oh dear it’s you, dear it’s you But don’t come back to me so apologetic Saying, “I never meant to cause the harm that I always do” For if you’re so serious then how come you always forget it? It’s like you have amnesia and you’ve forgotten this too And now you’re angry I refuse to repeat the process As if great injustice is all I ever do But any rational person would redirect their anger For dear it’s you, dear it’s you Oh dear it’s you, dear it’s you
6.
Talk Of The Town 03:41
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A mediocre character, nothing special here No gift for enchantment, no delight in the mirror Just a slim, fruitless being or an ordinary pawn But you’ll be the talk of the town after you’re gone In passing you quietly, they never look twice Not sought for your thoughts, much less your advice You could be completely naked, but they’d still look on But you’ll be the talk of the town after you’re gone So who are then? You must be new here Oh I never would have guessed that you’ve been around for years Well maybe I’ll see you though probably not But you’ll be the talk of the town after you’re gone Now you’ve got something happening, but there’s something else to do I made other plans and they don’t include you Perhaps maybe the next time if there’s nothing else going on Until there won’t be a next time after you’re gone And I heard you had aspirations, had something up your sleeve But until they are realized, you’re just a child with a dream And if you’re not here with the rise of the sun You’ll be the talk of the town after you’re gone Now the clock’s adding time and you’re counting down the days Until your absence is apparent and they’d wish that you stayed So you try to announce that you’re the chosen one But you’ll only be the talk of the town after you’re gone Now I heard you were someone, but I had no idea Why didn’t you shout from the heavens so we’d know that you were here? You just seemed so ordinary until we saw what you’d done And you’re the talk of the town now that you’re gone So when are you returning? We miss you so much We always adored you and all that you touched You had a golden grace, just ask anyone For you’re the talk of the town now that you’re gone
7.
21st Century Poet 03:38
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Your pretentions speak louder than the thoughts in your head Though the craft of word arrangement as you’ve learned of is dead You’re a shrinking necessity, yet you don’t seem to show it For you’re a 21st century poet And these intellectual undertakings you so boastfully claim Are merely gestures to an old kingdom that you’d wished to have reined But rather than irrelevance, it’s your condition you notice For you’re a 21st century poet Yeah, you’re a 21st century poet And you complain of your empty wallet from behind a fine cigarette Because only these you can afford for they help you to forget All the ones you loved so deeply who didn’t even know it For you’re a 21st century poet And you’ve skimmed just enough to say you’re well read And become every character or at least in your head Now your muse is your arrogance and you’re hopeless to control it For you’re a 21st century poet Yeah, you’re a 21st century poet You’re a 21st century poet You’re a 21st century poet And your endurance into extinction is your only will to live For you’re a 21st century poet You’re a 21st century poet
8.
The Messenger 03:38
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I am just the messenger; I hold no insight to the content I bring Bearing no great wisdom; just this vessel from which I sing For the only truths that I hold do not belong to me Yes, I know not the heart of the voyage as I am just the wings So here take my body, take all you want from me But leave me my hope that I shall one day wander free And these matters of love that you speak of, they matter not to me For I’ve never known this quest you’ve obsessed; I’ve only loved in the 2nd degree But I’ll deliver you your prescription for these pleasures you so desperately seek And I’ll leave them on your doorstep for that’s as far as I can reach So here take my body, take all you want from me But leave me my hope that I shall one day wander free And I have known many prophets, great wise men they believe Whose importance I’ve read is all in their heads; who bear the soil but not the seed They who think that their birth simply proves thei r worth and with death, great sorrow they’ll bring But we are all just the messengers; we are mere footnotes in history So here take my body, take all you want from me But leave me my hope that I shall one day wander free
9.
Sitting In A Graveyard 05:25
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I’ve been living off of offerings In exchange for my time Noticing in every village that I pass through, there’s a shrine Growing used to the journey The temporary conversations Though this is not the life I was born for, it’s what is mine Such a strange reality Beyond my wildest dreams Growing up to float down such a narrow stream For I’ll only reach a handful But that’s more than acceptable Yes I’m destined for no destination or so I believe And now we’re sittin’ in a graveyard Lookin’ for bones They’ll be around long after their stories have been told And I’m used to the memories But not this feeling Of knowing this is all that there was to know And I’ve had enough of talking Yes, I’m ready to listen Let’s please reverse the direction of this exchange of words Just say something crazy Perhaps a brief life history But if we only talk about ourselves, we’ll never learn And now we’re sittin’ in a graveyard Lookin’ for bones They’ll be around long after their stories have been told And I’m used to the memories But not this feeling Of knowing this is all that there was to know And we’ve been acting like everything is so permanent We use words like “forever” and “always” even though they’re not true So I’ve been learning just to exist in this moment To enjoy this life that I’ve been passing through And now we’re sittin’ in a graveyard Lookin’ for bones They’ll be around long after their stories have been told And I’m used to the memories But not this feeling Of knowing this is all that there was to know
10.
This Must Be Life 04:37
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What is this form That I have taken? I do not recall Asking for this But now I’m here, I am alive; I have dreams to realize And though it’s a very heavy burden of life, I must try I must try to live or be ready to die So now I’m dying to live; ahh oh this must be life Oh this must be life Oh this must be life And how much water is in your well? To put out the fire that’s in your hell? Well, it’s not about the problems that you know It’s how you cope I’ve spent my existence Just trying to be happy And though that’s unrealistic I’m still going to try For we can be a waste and let ourselves down Or do nothing about it and hope it works out But that’s not the answer I’ve come to realize And I’m dying to live; ahh oh this must be life Oh this must be life Oh this must be life And how much water is in your well? To put out the fire that’s in your hell? Well, it’s not about the problems that you know It’s how you cope

about

After customs agents made me to miss my plane back to the United States causing me to have to take the next one, which came a day later, I had lot of time on my hands and very little money. Being the only person in the international section of the terminal, I decided to record some demo versions of my unfinished forthcoming album.

This demo album was recorded very early in the morning on 3.12.2013 at gate 38 in the Helsinki-Vantaa Airport.

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released December 3, 2013

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Brian Smith Portland, Oregon

Brian Smith is a geofolk musician on an endless tour around the world.

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